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Woman Arrested For Masturbating With Happy Meal Toy In McDonald’s Ball Pit


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http://now8news.com/woman-arrested-happy-meal-toy-mcdonalds-ball-pit/

 

 

NEWS 8 –  Ohio resident Mindy Schillinger, 38, was arrested this weekend after she was caught masturbating inside of a McDonald’s Play Place ball pit with her son’s Happy Meal toy. Her self pleasing antics left children in the restaurant shocked and dismayed. Schillinger didn’t seem to mind, however, as eyewitnesses say her 4 year-old son was crying because he lost his ‘Transformers’ toy. And when she was approached by a McDonald’s employee and told to get out of the ball pit, she bit him.

 

 “One of our customers came up to the register and said a little boy was crying because he had lost his toy and did not know where his mom was,” said Lisa Hutchens, McDonald’s employee. “So when I sent the manager over to see what was going on, he saw a lady in the ball pit. She had her head back, eyes closed, and the balls around her were jumping around. At that point we knew it! She was doing something nasty in there.”

 

That’s when Hutchens said her manager went over and demanded she got out. When he grabbed her arm to escort her out, she had a “transformers toy that we provide to kids in their Happy Meals, and it was soaking wet.” Yes, Hutchins said the Transformers toy was covered in a “gooey” substance that “only some Monistat 7 could cure.”

“When we finally got her out of the ball pit, she threw the Transformers toy onto the ground. It looked like she had Optimus Prime diving in feet first.” said Hutchins. “And the stench… it was horrid! She definitely had a yeast infection.”

Schillinger was arrested and her son was put in the custody of Child Protective Services. The McDonald’s manager was treated for the bite he suffered from the woman. The Play Place will be temporarily closed for the week to sanitize the playground.

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18 hours ago, JDaveG said:

Calling BS on this one.  It reads like a parody site.

Absolutely.  Almost had me until he talked about the smell and said she had a yeast infection.  Kudos to the writer for going there, though.

15 hours ago, toadfishtom said:

it gives new meaning to quarterpounder with cheese 

Wrong restaurant I realize, but probably more like an Arby's Beef and Cheddar or Reuben.  :barf:

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On 4/18/2016 at 4:05 PM, JDaveG said:

Calling BS on this one.  It reads like a parody site.

It's definitely a parody site. They have some mirrored sites as well that have somewhat legit looking URL's for a news station. It's like the onion but without the redeeming quality of being completely over the top. Not a word of it being fictitious on any of their stories or about page either... seems someone wants a defamation lawsuit in their future. :munch:

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