Chip Kelly Denies Racism: “I Find People Of All Races And Colors Inferior To Me”

[Borat]

https://medium.com/sportspickle/chip-kelly-denies-racism-i-find-people-of-all-races-and-colors-inferior-to-me-3efe25bfc7d8

PHILADELPHIA — Eagles head coach Chip Kelly today scoffed at the perception that he is racist towards black players, insisting that he sees everyone in the world equally.

“Look, you won’t find a guy who is less racist than me,” Kelly told reporters. “I don’t care what race you are, what color, what gender or sexual orientation. I don’t care if you have purple skin and a horn growing out of your head. I know everyone is the same in that they are intellectually inferior to me, Chip Kelly.”

Kelly insisted that a person’s race doesn’t even enter his mind in his day-to-day dealings with people.

“The implications of racism are so shocking to me because, honestly, I don’t see race,” he said. “For example, when I sit down with you reporters, I don’t see a white reporter, and a black reporter, and an Asian reporter and a woman reporter. I just see a group of interchangeable dipshits who don’t know 1-percent of what I know about football. It’s the same way I deal with players.”

The coach also stated that he addressed the racism whispers with his players last night.

“I wanted to speak to them and clear up any misperceptions and nip this whole thing in the bud,” Kelly said. “I think they all left the meeting understanding who I am and where I stand.”

Running back DeMarco Murray said he appreciated hearing Kelly’s point of view.

“I’m new to the team, so it was good to hear him out,” said Murray. “He made it clear he doesn’t hate any race, except the human race, which he believes hasn’t evolved to the level of the Chip Kelly race and will one day be enslaved by Chip and his offspring. I guess I’m fine with that. Whatever.”

[Trouble]

I'm starting to like this chip Kelly guy.

Go Eagles. Except week one when we play you. Then the Eagles will find out why Falcons are the real birds of prey. We are romulaion botches.

[Aquietguy]

I'm starting to like this chip Kelly guy.

Go Eagles. Except week one when we play you. Then the Eagles will find out why Falcons are the real birds of prey. We are romulaion botches.

Romulaion ships are called war birds. Birds of prey are Klingon ships.

[Trouble]

Ohhhh.... i was close.