Francis York Morgan Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 (edited) Saturday, March 2, 2013In Tragic Turn of Events, Nolan ExposedBy Pat YasinskasThe Atlanta Falcons were thought to be in a good spot, particularly after the 2013 NFC Championship Game appearance, despite having lost three starters. Some skeptics believed that the losses of defensive end John Abraham and cornerback Dunta Robinson would cripple the Falcons, but with their faith in Mike Nolan, many were steadfast in their hope.Now, the real question comes out...were they right to be?In a shocking change of fortune, chemical imbalance tests conducted by biological chemistry majors at the University of Harvard have revealed that Mike Nolan is, in fact, not God. This news is especially unfortunate when you consider its timing, coinciding with the release of several players that, while old, many considered to be the metaphorical "backbone" of this franchise.Though the releases freed up roughly $16 million, skeptics now have reason for pause. Is this Falcons team truly headed in the right direction? Was last year's playoff victory just the same old Falcons getting lucky? Without the aid of a being capable of altering the space-time continuum and bending reality to his whim, are the Falcons really capable of doing...anything?The Falcons should be making plays for in-house free agents cornerback Brent Grimes and strong safety William Moore now, and maybe even defensive end Dwight Freeney, changes that wouldn't be possible without the release of so many other highly paid players. But one has to think changes will be coming with this important update on Nolan's status. The Falcons will likely look to demote him to LB coach or some other sub-deity position for the rest of his contract while bringing in a stopgap at DC for the time being - perhaps a minor Norse god until they can find someone to really carry the weight. Edited March 2, 2013 by Falcan Moore Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tuggle'2 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Proofises! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LookAboutFalcon Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Nah, he is just a demigod. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RYNE Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! haha That a boy Pat Y. that is on par with the rest of your work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnonFalcFan Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Can we at least see what happens in FA/Draft before we say this is a bad move? I mean, we let go of two players, not the entire defense. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Francis York Morgan Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 My bad, copied directly from the site so the format was a shade screwy. Still...it's pretty disturbing news. Not sure what Smitty plans on doing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AF89 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Pics or it didn't happen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THE ICEMAN Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! haha That a boy Pat Y. that is on par with the rest of your workI agree sounds like something Pat would write Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tuggle'2 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 My bad, copied directly from the site so the format was a shade screwy. Still...it's pretty disturbing news. Not sure what Smitty plans on doing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
didz Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Why does anyone think the Falcons should get Dwight Freeney? Didn't we just get rid of a guy who would play the same role Freeney would play if he joined the team? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Butudontseeme™ Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RYNE Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Why does anyone think the Falcons should get Dwight Freeney? Didn't we just get rid of a guy who would play the same role Freeney would play if he joined the team?hey... if Pat Y writes it, you take that baby to the bank! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwifalcon Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 SMH....lol..lol.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kizu_7 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 hey... if Pat Y writes it, you take that baby to the bank!the monopoly bank maybe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peyton Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Big props to Pat Y for figuring this week just six weeks after it was readily apparent to everyone else in the universe with eyes and at least half a brain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrobinson3803 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 But he thinks Rob Ryan is going to make the Saints the #1 overall defense in the league last year Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Knight of God Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Could have told you that. He's not in my Bible anywhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Knight of God Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Sorry man, being a poor DC does not make you the anti-Christ. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AF89 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Sorry man, being a poor DC does not make you the anti-Christ.How about this guy?The Father of Lies... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Francis York Morgan Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 Sorry man, being a poor DC does not make you the anti-Christ.But how can we really know for sure? Assuming saves lives...guilty until proven innocent. Nolan could very well be the anti-Christ. Or at the very least a lesser demon lingering in the brimstone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aftermath Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Could have told you that. He's not in my Bible anywhere.Nolan 4:12And the tight end shall run free, and he who hath the ball shall never be tackled. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sven Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Well this is a pretty convincing fake. Nice job. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AF89 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 But how can we really know for sure? Assuming saves lives...guilty until proven innocent. Nolan could very well be the anti-Christ. Or at the very least a lesser demon lingering in the brimstone.He was talking about BVG. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Knight of God Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 I'm gonna go. The weather has been weird here and I have tall trees around my house. Looks like a little rain...lightning may soon follow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kizu_7 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Nolan 4:12And the tight end shall run free, and he who hath the ball shall never be tackled. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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