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corny joke


raysnill1

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Dad buys a LIE DETECTOR ROBOT which slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it at dinner.

Dad: Son, where were you today?

Son: At school dad

ROBOT SLAPS SON

Son: Ok, I watched a DVD at my friend's house!

Dad: What DVD?

Son: Toy Story

ROBOT SLAPS SON

Son: Ok! It was a porn

Dad: WHAT! When I was your age I didn't know what porn was!

ROBOT SLAPS DAD

MOM: (laughing) He is certainly YOUR son

ROBOT SLAPS MOM

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Dad buys a LIE DETECTOR ROBOT which slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it at dinner.

Dad: Son, where were you today?

Son: At school dad

ROBOT SLAPS SON

Son: Ok, I watched a DVD at my friend's house!

Dad: What DVD?

Son: Toy Story

ROBOT SLAPS SON

Son: Ok! It was a porn

Dad: WHAT! When I was your age I didn't know what porn was!

ROBOT SLAPS DAD

MOM: (laughing) He is certainly YOUR son

ROBOT SLAPS MOM

:lol: :lol: :lol:

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A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."

"What?" said the puzzled groom.

"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.

Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"

"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

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Guest mashburn

So I married a blonde. And as many as you all know, she is the best wife in the world. She got me season tickets ever since we got married. And this year she topped it with also going to the game opener at chicago.

But today I am left shaking my head at her. Because I read this joke to her, and she looks at me and says "i don't get it". So I explain it; she still doesn't get it.

She has done the many many times of "I don't get it"jokes.

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Guest mashburn

more talk about me, less bad jokes, and lines about bottle blondes with black roots.

im coming to my town in my house to destroy y'all. If you though Kolb worked y'all you aint seen what i can do.

Great it's black beans. They always give me the runs. And he knows corn on the kolb always works a number on me for many reasons, one:i can never destroy it, and two: it sticks in my teeth days later.

Oh wait this is prick the vick talking. Well what I said earlier is still correct, cause vick will run all over the place with our improved defense.

(dude these trolls have to come up with better crap then this) (this was way to easy)

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