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I farted in a kid's face at the gas station


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I gassed the QT today, near the drink section. I thought I was alone. It was loud and smelly. When I turned around, there was a four or five year old kid staring at me.

I felt bad... for about two seconds. Then I laughed at him.

On my way out I farted again on a lady. She heard me and said "you disgusting pig." It was a bad decision for her to open her mouth to talk after the fart because as I started up the car, I saw her holding her nose and waving her hand around to dissipate the funk cloud that I had created. She inadvertently ate my fart.

I like farting.

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I gassed the QT today, near the drink section. I thought I was alone. It was loud and smelly. When I turned around, there was a four or five year old kid staring at me.

I felt bad... for about two seconds. Then I laughed at him.

On my way out I farted again on a lady. She heard me and said "you disgusting pig." It was a bad decision for her to open her mouth to talk after the fart because as I started up the car, I saw her holding her nose and waving her hand around to dissipate the funk cloud that I had created. She inadvertently ate my fart.

I like farting.

I'm not a 4 or 5 year old kid, I am a little person, and I was insulted.

The lady at the door deserved what she got, though.

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I gassed the QT today, near the drink section. I thought I was alone. It was loud and smelly. When I turned around, there was a four or five year old kid staring at me.

I felt bad... for about two seconds. Then I laughed at him.

On my way out I farted again on a lady. She heard me and said "you disgusting pig." It was a bad decision for her to open her mouth to talk after the fart because as I started up the car, I saw her holding her nose and waving her hand around to dissipate the funk cloud that I had created. She inadvertently ate my fart.

I like farting.

:lol::lol:

One of these days this dude is going to fart on the wrong person and end up getting the crap beat out of himself. When you do come back and let us know how that turned out for you. ;)

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I gassed the QT today, near the drink section. I thought I was alone. It was loud and smelly. When I turned around, there was a four or five year old kid staring at me.

I felt bad... for about two seconds. Then I laughed at him.

On my way out I farted again on a lady. She heard me and said "you disgusting pig." It was a bad decision for her to open her mouth to talk after the fart because as I started up the car, I saw her holding her nose and waving her hand around to dissipate the funk cloud that I had created. She inadvertently ate my fart.

I like farting.

Why the **** did people neg you? At least you bring some variety and comedy to this message board.

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you are now my hero sir.... you are now my hero..

also your post is pretty funny if you read it like a poem or short story... could you rewrite it and make it a little more dramatic....

NO NO NO.. you cant mess with greatness... my mistake.. would i ask shakespere to rewrite any of his works... such as asking him to rewrite his twilight series..

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:huh:

I'm glad you don't understand what I said. That makes it funnier to me! :lol:

you are now my hero sir.... you are now my hero..

also your post is pretty funny if you read it like a poem or short story... could you rewrite it and make it a little more dramatic....

NO NO NO.. you cant mess with greatness... my mistake.. would i ask shakespere to rewrite any of his works... such as asking him to rewrite his twilight series..

A fart by any other name, smells the same.

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My brother is the "lets give 'em something to talk about" type when it comes to using public bathrooms. He likes to make it exactly clear that he's blowing his colon out by making it as noisy as possible. Then he'll "wait them out" and make sure the bathroom is clear befor he comes out of the stall that way, his anonymity is intact and everyone can still wonder who the mystery farter was. :blink: Mystery Farter Man's favorite claim to fame was the time he was in a stall next to a guy talking on his cell phone and it was clear to MFM that the guy wanted to conceal the fact that he was on the throne to the person on the other end. Thats when MFM sprang into action with as many farts he could muster up and several toilet flushes. Cell phone guy was busted cold. :lol:

My brother is a little strange.. :ph34r:

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