=abrahamburger= Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 I gassed the QT today, near the drink section. I thought I was alone. It was loud and smelly. When I turned around, there was a four or five year old kid staring at me.I felt bad... for about two seconds. Then I laughed at him. On my way out I farted again on a lady. She heard me and said "you disgusting pig." It was a bad decision for her to open her mouth to talk after the fart because as I started up the car, I saw her holding her nose and waving her hand around to dissipate the funk cloud that I had created. She inadvertently ate my fart.I like farting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mojo Risin Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 Ya, needless to say that you were alone. Anyone could guess that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rightsaidfred Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 I gassed the QT today, near the drink section. I thought I was alone. It was loud and smelly. When I turned around, there was a four or five year old kid staring at me.I felt bad... for about two seconds. Then I laughed at him. On my way out I farted again on a lady. She heard me and said "you disgusting pig." It was a bad decision for her to open her mouth to talk after the fart because as I started up the car, I saw her holding her nose and waving her hand around to dissipate the funk cloud that I had created. She inadvertently ate my fart.I like farting.I'm not a 4 or 5 year old kid, I am a little person, and I was insulted.The lady at the door deserved what she got, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
=abrahamburger= Posted March 13, 2010 Author Share Posted March 13, 2010 Ya, needless to say that you were alone. Anyone could guess thatYeah, when you go to the gas station you take a date."Hey baby, you want another bageldog?" *busts out roll of nickels* "Yo I got dis." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mojo Risin Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 Yeah, when you go to the gas station you take a date."Hey baby, you want another bageldog?" *busts out roll of nickels* "Yo I got dis."I guess your idea of "courting" would be to blow farts in her face. Say hi to Rosie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brehus Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CO1MFF75egc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flip Wilson Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 My wife never farts. The rest of my family never doesn't fart. We have a baby that is a month and a half old. He can fart like a champion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
=abrahamburger= Posted March 13, 2010 Author Share Posted March 13, 2010 I guess your idea of "courting" would be to blow farts in her face. Say hi to Rosie.Your farts smell like your date. Say hi to Robert. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mojo Risin Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 Your farts smell like your date. Say hi to Robert. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Misznay-Schardin Posted March 14, 2010 Share Posted March 14, 2010 lol at this thread, and lol at all the weaksauced individuals tossing around negatives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dharma Initiative Posted March 14, 2010 Share Posted March 14, 2010 Nice! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon Fanatic Posted March 14, 2010 Share Posted March 14, 2010 I gassed the QT today, near the drink section. I thought I was alone. It was loud and smelly. When I turned around, there was a four or five year old kid staring at me.I felt bad... for about two seconds. Then I laughed at him. On my way out I farted again on a lady. She heard me and said "you disgusting pig." It was a bad decision for her to open her mouth to talk after the fart because as I started up the car, I saw her holding her nose and waving her hand around to dissipate the funk cloud that I had created. She inadvertently ate my fart.I like farting. One of these days this dude is going to fart on the wrong person and end up getting the crap beat out of himself. When you do come back and let us know how that turned out for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pencilpusher. just because Posted March 14, 2010 Share Posted March 14, 2010 I'm not a 4 or 5 year old kid, I am a little person, and I was insulted.The lady at the door deserved what she got, though.Snake? is that you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taylor228193 Posted March 14, 2010 Share Posted March 14, 2010 I gassed the QT today, near the drink section. I thought I was alone. It was loud and smelly. When I turned around, there was a four or five year old kid staring at me.I felt bad... for about two seconds. Then I laughed at him. On my way out I farted again on a lady. She heard me and said "you disgusting pig." It was a bad decision for her to open her mouth to talk after the fart because as I started up the car, I saw her holding her nose and waving her hand around to dissipate the funk cloud that I had created. She inadvertently ate my fart.I like farting.Why the **** did people neg you? At least you bring some variety and comedy to this message board. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mathis81WR Posted March 14, 2010 Share Posted March 14, 2010 Great story! Farts are always funny and farting on little kids is even funnier! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rvrndzombii Posted March 14, 2010 Share Posted March 14, 2010 you are now my hero sir.... you are now my hero..also your post is pretty funny if you read it like a poem or short story... could you rewrite it and make it a little more dramatic....NO NO NO.. you cant mess with greatness... my mistake.. would i ask shakespere to rewrite any of his works... such as asking him to rewrite his twilight series.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
=abrahamburger= Posted March 14, 2010 Author Share Posted March 14, 2010 I'm glad you don't understand what I said. That makes it funnier to me! you are now my hero sir.... you are now my hero..also your post is pretty funny if you read it like a poem or short story... could you rewrite it and make it a little more dramatic....NO NO NO.. you cant mess with greatness... my mistake.. would i ask shakespere to rewrite any of his works... such as asking him to rewrite his twilight series..A fart by any other name, smells the same. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LouDog Posted March 14, 2010 Share Posted March 14, 2010 (edited) why are people hating on dude for this thread? This **** is hilarious. Good job sir Edited March 14, 2010 by Ryan2DouglasTD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NCFalconfan Posted March 15, 2010 Share Posted March 15, 2010 My brother is the "lets give 'em something to talk about" type when it comes to using public bathrooms. He likes to make it exactly clear that he's blowing his colon out by making it as noisy as possible. Then he'll "wait them out" and make sure the bathroom is clear befor he comes out of the stall that way, his anonymity is intact and everyone can still wonder who the mystery farter was. :blink: Mystery Farter Man's favorite claim to fame was the time he was in a stall next to a guy talking on his cell phone and it was clear to MFM that the guy wanted to conceal the fact that he was on the throne to the person on the other end. Thats when MFM sprang into action with as many farts he could muster up and several toilet flushes. Cell phone guy was busted cold. My brother is a little strange.. :ph34r: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
capologist Posted March 15, 2010 Share Posted March 15, 2010 A fart by any other name, smells the same. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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