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BillyWitchDoctor (4/19/2008)
Heådshø (4/19/2008)
falconfoozball (4/18/2008)
BillyWitchDoctor (4/18/2008)

Wow man, that was too funny. I had to put my head down on my desk to try and muffle my laughter.

Not nearly as funny as Headshot's story, though. That is American Pie Hollywood type ish, right there.

My friends have told me that I should write a movie script about my life and I thought about it but I always said that 1, I don't know how to write a movie script, and 2, I think I'd get sued by the people of American Pie, it's funny that you said that.

There's literally hundred of ******** stories that I could put in to a book or a movie and I know people would think it was funny, because everyone's done dumb ##### before. Maybe they didn't send accidental text messages that ruined their chance at having sex or maybe they didn't lie to sorority girls about being a pitcher in the minor leagues or maybe they didn't spend 2 and a half hours laying in the dirt underneath a porch with a broken ankle while the cops stood right above them giving tickets for underage drinking to all of their friends...but people can at least relate to that kind of stupidity. Or at least I think they could.

Lmao, no but in high school a couple of my friends and I were chased around for an hour or so by like 8 college students after we broke one of their car windows.

Once again, this reminds me of another story, one that might be kinda long, I dunno, but I thought it was not only funny, but clever as well. I love story time.

When I was in high school Panama City was like the big cool place to go for Spring Break, even though EVERYONE from school went there so it really wasn't any different than hanging out in Snellville accept we had a beach to chill on.

But the first night we were down there we were walking on the beach and met a group of girls who told us we should come up to a party that some people they knew were having at their hotel. So we go up and there's like a hundred people on the top floor of this ****** hotel, and it's nothing but doosh bags all over the place. You know who I'm talking about too, the kind of doosh bags with popped collars and aviator glasses and shaggy hair, and hemp ankle bracelets...basically it was a UGA frat party.

So we walk in with these girls and we head to the balcony to have a smoke and get some beers, and there is this ##### burglar like standing guard over the coolers. So I was like "hey man is it cool if we grab some beers?" and ##### burglar is like "You have to pay first." We all looked at each other like WTF? Pay? This is a hotel party and you're making people pay to drink beer?

So I asked him how much and he told me 2 dollars a beer. First of all, if you're going to charge people, charge them a flat door charge and let them drink whatever they want to all night, at least that's how any REAL party is run. Second of all, don't say something stupid like 2 dollars a beer, because all that will result in is a bunch of punk### high school kids on spring break devising a plan to steal all of your beer.

So I was like "Whatever man I'm not paying 2 dollars a beer, we've got over 300 beers back at our place (And we did, we each spent about 200 dollars a piece on liquor and beer the first day we went down there) we don't need to pay." So he crosses his arms like he's some kind of bad### and stands up real straight in order to protect the beer. One of my friends was like "dude lets just leave, this place sucks." But there was WAAAAY too many beautiful girls to just leave for a sausage fest. So I went up to the group of girls that invited us up to begin with and asked them if they wanted to come to a real party at a nicer hotel (Because we got hooked up phat by a friend's uncle who worked at the hotel and he gave us the luxury suite for like $900 for the whole week) where they didn't have to pay to drink and they all said "Well **** yeah, all these guys are gay."

So I told them to go ahead and start heading to our hotel right then, and if anyone from this party calls you guys, don't tell them where you are or where you're going. Then me and my friends all huddled up and devised one of the greatest plans ever, I'm talking about some Ocean's Eleven type #####.

There were 8 of us, so we decided that one guy was going to act like a drunk idiot and start ##### with somebody, and another one of us were going to have his back, because there were a lot of these guys and they already didn't like us because we showed up with all the girls and they were all hanging out with us instead of them. Another three would take the elevator down to the pool and wait, and myself and the last two guys would stay up at the room.

And so the gears of deception begin to turn.

Me and two other of my friends head to the balcony and light up some cigarettes as the cooler guard just stands there and stares at us. Our other friend starts acting like a drunk idiot by slapping away the beer pong ball and cussing at the people playing beer pong. Finally one of the dooshes pushes my friend, and my other friend jumps in and a huge brawl almost ensues. Cooler guard runs inside and everyones screaming and pushing each other...except for me and two of my friends who in the chaos, were left all alone on the balcony. We close the balcony door, and proceed to throw all 3 coolers over the balcony and into the pool below, where our other 3 friends are waiting to pull them out and run down the beach with them. Me and the other two that were on the balcony then rush into the party and break everyone up, telling everyone that we're sorry and that he's an idiot when he's drunk and that we were just going to leave. The dooshes agree that that was the best course of action, so we head out the front door and BOLT towards the stairs and out of the hotel complex. We ran down the beach with the girls, and with our newly acquired product to spend the rest of the night at our hotel getting absolutely destroyed and playing strip poker, which really just ended up in the girls just wanting to take all their clothes off.

I just made myself depressed telling that story, high school went too fast:crying:

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Consider ****** privileges revoked, unless you are a really good BSer and tell her a jealous friend stole your phone and sent that text and not you.

check 6 posts above you and you might find him

Once again, this reminds me of another story, one that might be kinda long, I dunno, but I thought it was not only funny, but clever as well. I love story time.

When I was in high school Panama City was like the big cool place to go for Spring Break, even though EVERYONE from school went there so it really wasn't any different than hanging out in Snellville accept we had a beach to chill on.

But the first night we were down there we were walking on the beach and met a group of girls who told us we should come up to a party that some people they knew were having at their hotel. So we go up and there's like a hundred people on the top floor of this ****** hotel, and it's nothing but doosh bags all over the place. You know who I'm talking about too, the kind of doosh bags with popped collars and aviator glasses and shaggy hair, and hemp ankle bracelets...basically it was a UGA frat party.

So we walk in with these girls and we head to the balcony to have a smoke and get some beers, and there is this ##### burglar like standing guard over the coolers. So I was like "hey man is it cool if we grab some beers?" and ##### burglar is like "You have to pay first." We all looked at each other like WTF? Pay? This is a hotel party and you're making people pay to drink beer?

So I asked him how much and he told me 2 dollars a beer. First of all, if you're going to charge people, charge them a flat door charge and let them drink whatever they want to all night, at least that's how any REAL party is run. Second of all, don't say something stupid like 2 dollars a beer, because all that will result in is a bunch of punk### high school kids on spring break devising a plan to steal all of your beer.

So I was like "Whatever man I'm not paying 2 dollars a beer, we've got over 300 beers back at our place (And we did, we each spent about 200 dollars a piece on liquor and beer the first day we went down there) we don't need to pay." So he crosses his arms like he's some kind of bad### and stands up real straight in order to protect the beer. One of my friends was like "dude lets just leave, this place sucks." But there was WAAAAY too many beautiful girls to just leave for a sausage fest. So I went up to the group of girls that invited us up to begin with and asked them if they wanted to come to a real party at a nicer hotel (Because we got hooked up phat by a friend's uncle who worked at the hotel and he gave us the luxury suite for like $900 for the whole week) where they didn't have to pay to drink and they all said "Well **** yeah, all these guys are gay."

So I told them to go ahead and start heading to our hotel right then, and if anyone from this party calls you guys, don't tell them where you are or where you're going. Then me and my friends all huddled up and devised one of the greatest plans ever, I'm talking about some Ocean's Eleven type #####.

There were 7 of us, so we decided that one guy was going to act like a drunk idiot and start ##### with somebody, and another one of us were going to have his back, because there were a lot of these guys and they already didn't like us because we showed up with all the girls and they were all hanging out with us instead of them. Another three would take the elevator down to the pool and wait, and myself and the last two guys would stay up at the room.

And so the gears of deception begin to turn.

Me and two other of my friends head to the balcony and light up some cigarettes as the cooler guard just stands there and stares at us. Our other friend starts acting like a drunk idiot by slapping away the beer pong ball and cussing at the people playing beer pong. Finally one of the dooshes pushes my friend, and my other friend jumps in and a huge brawl almost ensues. Cooler guard runs inside and everyones screaming and pushing each other...except for me and two of my friends who in the chaos, were left all alone on the balcony. We close the balcony door, and proceed to throw all 3 coolers over the balcony and into the pool below, where our other 3 friends are waiting to pull them out and run down the beach with them. Me and the other two that were on the balcony then rush into the party and break everyone up, telling everyone that we're sorry and that he's an idiot when he's drunk and that we were just going to leave. The dooshes agree that that was the best course of action, so we head out the front door and BOLT towards the stairs and out of the hotel complex. We ran down the beach with the girls, and with our newly acquired product to spend the rest of the night at our hotel getting absolutely destroyed and playing strip poker, which really just ended up in the girls just wanting to take all their clothes off.

I just made myself depressed telling that story, high school went too fast:crying:

Have you considered writing a book? Your stories are very inspirational.

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You can have the thread back (not that I ever had it.), I didn't say what I said to get attention, I said it because it's true. I wasn't saying you were a bad person, and I realize most people do what you do, I personally just don't agree with it and find it amusing that you got yourself caught doing such things. But yeah, no need for sensible posts on a message board, no place at all for such things.

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I got astory fer you'uns.

I lived out in back of

my parents' place most of my life...

in a little old shed

that my daddy'd built for me.

They didn't want me in the housewith the rest of them.so I sat around in the shed

looking at the ground.I didn't have no floor...but I had me a hole dug out

to lay down in...had a quilt or two to put down there.

My father...was a hardworking man

most of his life...not that I can say the same

for myself.I mostly just sat around

in the shed...tinkered around

with a lawn mower or two...went to school off and on

from time to timeBut the children out there,

they were very cruel to me...and made quite a bit of sport of me,

made fun of me quite a bit.So mostly I just sat around

out there in the shed.

My daddy...worked at the sawmill,

down at the planer mill..for an old man named Dixon.

Old man Dixon was a very cruel fellow.Didn't treat his employees well

or pay them well.Didn't pay my daddy too much of a wage.Just barely enough to get by,

I reckon.I reckon he got by all right.

They used to come out,

one or the other of them...usually my mother...feed me pretty regular.So I know he made enough so I could have mustard and biscuits...three or four times a week.

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Lmao, great story Headshot, that reminded me of that scene in Superbad (if you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about). I too have had a similar event, that I don't feel like typing up because it is almost the same, just different people, different place & there was no need to come up with an ocean eleven style plan.

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FalconFansince80 (4/19/2008)
I got astory fer you'uns.

I lived out in back of

my parents' place most of my life...

in a little old shed

that my daddy'd built for me.

They didn't want me in the housewith the rest of them.so I sat around in the shed

looking at the ground.I didn't have no floor...but I had me a hole dug out

to lay down in...had a quilt or two to put down there.

My father...was a hardworking man

most of his life...not that I can say the same

for myself.I mostly just sat around

in the shed...tinkered around

with a lawn mower or two...went to school off and on

from time to timeBut the children out there,

they were very cruel to me...and made quite a bit of sport of me,

made fun of me quite a bit.So mostly I just sat around

out there in the shed.

My daddy...worked at the sawmill,

down at the planer mill..for an old man named Dixon.

Old man Dixon was a very cruel fellow.Didn't treat his employees well

or pay them well.Didn't pay my daddy too much of a wage.Just barely enough to get by,

I reckon.I reckon he got by all right.

They used to come out,

one or the other of them...usually my mother...feed me pretty regular.So I know he made enough so I could have mustard and biscuits...three or four times a week.

I'm just curious how long you can keep that up lol

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BillyWitchDoctor (4/20/2008)
Lmao, great story Headshot, that reminded me of that scene in Superbad (if you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about). I too have had a similar event, that I don't feel like typing up because it is almost the same, just different people, different place & there was no need to come up with an ocean eleven style plan.

Sadly I have not seen Superbad, which is kind of shocking considering that I'm the one guy on these boards who probably watches WAAY too many movies. I'm probably going to buy it this weekend and watch it, especially if there is a scene similar to my story, I'll get a kick out of that.

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Heådshø (4/20/2008)
BillyWitchDoctor (4/20/2008)
Lmao, great story Headshot, that reminded me of that scene in Superbad (if you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about). I too have had a similar event, that I don't feel like typing up because it is almost the same, just different people, different place & there was no need to come up with an ocean eleven style plan.

Sadly I have not seen Superbad, which is kind of shocking considering that I'm the one guy on these boards who probably watches WAAY too many movies. I'm probably going to buy it this weekend and watch it, especially if there is a scene similar to my story, I'll get a kick out of that.

Oh man, you need to watch it, it was very funny. You should know what scene I'm talking about when you watch it.

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BillyWitchDoctor (4/20/2008)
Heådshø (4/20/2008)
BillyWitchDoctor (4/20/2008)
Lmao, great story Headshot, that reminded me of that scene in Superbad (if you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about). I too have had a similar event, that I don't feel like typing up because it is almost the same, just different people, different place & there was no need to come up with an ocean eleven style plan.

Sadly I have not seen Superbad, which is kind of shocking considering that I'm the one guy on these boards who probably watches WAAY too many movies. I'm probably going to buy it this weekend and watch it, especially if there is a scene similar to my story, I'll get a kick out of that.

Oh man, you need to watch it, it was very funny. You should know what scene I'm talking about when you watch it.

Yeah I haven't seen Superbad or There Will Be Blood or No Country For Old Men yet, and since I now have nothing to do, maybe I'll catch up on some movie watching. I need to recharge my batteries and get myself prepared for next week's mission anyways, so it will be a good time to do so.

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I think there was a lot of hype about Superbad, but it's still got the immature humor I love.

No Country for Old men is another story. The guy in the movie looking for his money should have his picture under the word "ruthless". Best movie I have seen since Man on Fire with Denzel.

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Beau J (4/20/2008)
I think there was a lot of hype about Superbad, but it's still got the immature humor I love.

No Country for Old men is another story. The guy in the movie looking for his money should have his picture under the word "ruthless". Best movie I have seen since Man on Fire with Denzel.

That is my favorite movie, and No Country was very good itself. I own both. :D And Beau J, what's the most you've ever lost on a coin flip?

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Heådshø (4/20/2008)
BillyWitchDoctor (4/20/2008)
Heådshø (4/20/2008)
BillyWitchDoctor (4/20/2008)
Lmao, great story Headshot, that reminded me of that scene in Superbad (if you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about). I too have had a similar event, that I don't feel like typing up because it is almost the same, just different people, different place & there was no need to come up with an ocean eleven style plan.

Sadly I have not seen Superbad, which is kind of shocking considering that I'm the one guy on these boards who probably watches WAAY too many movies. I'm probably going to buy it this weekend and watch it, especially if there is a scene similar to my story, I'll get a kick out of that.

Oh man, you need to watch it, it was very funny. You should know what scene I'm talking about when you watch it.

Yeah I haven't seen Superbad or There Will Be Blood or No Country For Old Men yet, and since I now have nothing to do, maybe I'll catch up on some movie watching. I need to recharge my batteries and get myself prepared for next week's mission anyways, so it will be a good time to do so.

I'd suggest watching them in that order as well. I watched There Will Be Blood the other night, very good movie, but a full on drama with very little action. But Daniel Day-Lewis is an amazing actor.

Also, if I'm thinking of the same scene, I wouldn't say it's a similar situation, but could see how it would remind you of it. ...and whoever said Superbad isn't a movie you watch more than once, I personally have watched it probably 5 times, usually with different people each time to gauge their opinions on the movie, I tend to do that. See if they laugh where I laugh, things like that. I can't wait for The Pineapple Express.

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Also, if I'm thinking of the same scene, I wouldn't say it's a similar situation, but could see how it would remind you of it.

That's probably a better way of putting it, either way I got the point across to someone who has seen the movie and they knew what I was talking about.

+1 for BillyWitchDoctor.

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Heådshø (4/20/2008)
BillyWitchDoctor (4/20/2008)
Lmao, great story Headshot, that reminded me of that scene in Superbad (if you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about). I too have had a similar event, that I don't feel like typing up because it is almost the same, just different people, different place & there was no need to come up with an ocean eleven style plan.

Sadly I have not seen Superbad, which is kind of shocking considering that I'm the one guy on these boards who probably watches WAAY too many movies. I'm probably going to buy it this weekend and watch it, especially if there is a scene similar to my story, I'll get a kick out of that.

hold up bro. i watch way to much movies for my own good, and its online, jst PM me if you want some sites to watch it.( the man might be watching on this site):unsure:

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BillyWitchDoctor (4/20/2008)
Also, if I'm thinking of the same scene, I wouldn't say it's a similar situation, but could see how it would remind you of it.

That's probably a better way of putting it, either way I got the point across to someone who has seen the movie and they knew what I was talking about.

+1 for BillyWitchDoctor.

agree its not super similar, but its kind of. Super bad was awesome, and im actually going to buy it, even if i normal dont buy movies.

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Dem Birds Can Fly (4/20/2008)
FalconFansince80 (4/19/2008)
I got astory fer you'uns.

I lived out in back of

my parents' place most of my life...

in a little old shed

that my daddy'd built for me.

They didn't want me in the housewith the rest of them.so I sat around in the shed

looking at the ground.I didn't have no floor...but I had me a hole dug out

to lay down in...had a quilt or two to put down there.

My father...was a hardworking man

most of his life...not that I can say the same

for myself.I mostly just sat around

in the shed...tinkered around

with a lawn mower or two...went to school off and on

from time to timeBut the children out there,

they were very cruel to me...and made quite a bit of sport of me,

made fun of me quite a bit.So mostly I just sat around

out there in the shed.

My daddy...worked at the sawmill,

down at the planer mill..for an old man named Dixon.

Old man Dixon was a very cruel fellow.Didn't treat his employees well

or pay them well.Didn't pay my daddy too much of a wage.Just barely enough to get by,

I reckon.I reckon he got by all right.

They used to come out,

one or the other of them...usually my mother...feed me pretty regular.So I know he made enough so I could have mustard and biscuits...three or four times a week.

I'm just curious how long you can keep that up lol

Hopefully a while cause I laugh my ##### off every time i read that ##### :w00t:

Slingblade is one of the funniest movies ever made!

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Mathis81WR (4/20/2008)
Dem Birds Can Fly (4/20/2008)
FalconFansince80 (4/19/2008)
I got astory fer you'uns.

I lived out in back of

my parents' place most of my life...

in a little old shed

that my daddy'd built for me.

They didn't want me in the housewith the rest of them.so I sat around in the shed

looking at the ground.I didn't have no floor...but I had me a hole dug out

to lay down in...had a quilt or two to put down there.

My father...was a hardworking man

most of his life...not that I can say the same

for myself.I mostly just sat around

in the shed...tinkered around

with a lawn mower or two...went to school off and on

from time to timeBut the children out there,

they were very cruel to me...and made quite a bit of sport of me,

made fun of me quite a bit.So mostly I just sat around

out there in the shed.

My daddy...worked at the sawmill,

down at the planer mill..for an old man named Dixon.

Old man Dixon was a very cruel fellow.Didn't treat his employees well

or pay them well.Didn't pay my daddy too much of a wage.Just barely enough to get by,

I reckon.I reckon he got by all right.

They used to come out,

one or the other of them...usually my mother...feed me pretty regular.So I know he made enough so I could have mustard and biscuits...three or four times a week.

I'm just curious how long you can keep that up lol

Hopefully a while cause I laugh my ##### off every time i read that ##### :w00t:

Slingblade is one of the funniest movies ever made!

While I give him credit for finding an appropriate quote from the movie to fit nearly every thread he posts in, when you have seen Slingblade as many times as I have, it just gets a little old.

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bossFALCON (4/21/2008)
lol wow this thread is still going.

can anyone say HOF?;)

While I am honoured that this thread had such an overwhelming support for the first REAL thread to be inducted into the new board's HOF, I must say that I doubt it ever gets there.

A little too "risque" I guess for a website that bills itself as a "family site," which I understand due to the large amounts of 5-10 year olds that post on this message board.

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Heådshø (4/21/2008)
bossFALCON (4/21/2008)
lol wow this thread is still going.

can anyone say HOF?;)

While I am honoured that this thread had such an overwhelming support for the first REAL thread to be inducted into the new board's HOF, I must say that I doubt it ever gets there.

A little too "risque" I guess for a website that bills itself as a "family site," which I understand due to the large amounts of 5-10 year olds that post on this message board.

BAN THEM! Just kiddding, please don't band me.

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Heådshø (4/21/2008)
bossFALCON (4/21/2008)
lol wow this thread is still going.

can anyone say HOF?;)

While I am honoured that this thread had such an overwhelming support for the first REAL thread to be inducted into the new board's HOF, I must say that I doubt it ever gets there.

A little too "risque" I guess for a website that bills itself as a "family site," which I understand due to the large amounts of 5-10 year olds that post on this message board.

yea i know what you're saying.:( i dont really think that it will get in HOF either, but it doesnt hurt to lobby for it.:cool:

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BillyWitchDoctor (4/21/2008)
Heådshø (4/21/2008)
bossFALCON (4/21/2008)
lol wow this thread is still going.

can anyone say HOF?;)

While I am honoured that this thread had such an overwhelming support for the first REAL thread to be inducted into the new board's HOF, I must say that I doubt it ever gets there.

A little too "risque" I guess for a website that bills itself as a "family site," which I understand due to the large amounts of 5-10 year olds that post on this message board.

BAN THEM! Just kiddding, please don't band me.

Yeah, don't banded him.
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bossFALCON (4/21/2008)
Heådshø (4/21/2008)
bossFALCON (4/21/2008)
lol wow this thread is still going.

can anyone say HOF?;)

While I am honoured that this thread had such an overwhelming support for the first REAL thread to be inducted into the new board's HOF, I must say that I doubt it ever gets there.

A little too "risque" I guess for a website that bills itself as a "family site," which I understand due to the large amounts of 5-10 year olds that post on this message board.

yea i know what you're saying.:( i dont really think that it will get in HOF either, but it doesnt hurt to lobby for it.:cool:

As long as it is HOF in your hearts and minds...that is all that matters.

And you can tell I've been drinking because with every post I get a little bit gayer.

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